Thursday, February 26, 2009

How Can You Bloom in the Desert?

Why did the monks and hermits went to the desert? To run away from the world? Or did they go there to find something deeper in life and in themselves. The desert can be a powerful experience. It can strip us down. It can also be a place where we confront our inner demons that haunts us. The desert can purify us and bring out the greatness that lies in us. In the desert one is forced to live on the basics. You are stripped down to all excessive luxuries. You learn to live simply and be more grateful with what you have. The silence of the desert takes away all the noise and distractions you fill yourself. There you are able to listen to yourself. In the desert you will find who you are and who you are not. It brings the best and worst in you. It is a place where you will find your weakness but also your strengths. Because the desert is a barren place, you cannot escape from the inner demons that you run away from. There you have the opportunity to confront them and defeat them. The Desert is Place of Preparation. John the Baptist lived in the desert before he preached. Jesus also lead by the Spirit went to the desert for 40 days before He started his ministry. Now many of us cannot afford to the desert. But we can enter into a desert experience where we are. Trials are desert experience. Trial makes us feel so barren, so alone. Our sufferings in life can make us feel we are living in the desert. The Blooming Desert It’s amazing, the difference a drop of rain can make. Almost overnight, it seems, the desert springs to life. The seeds that lie dormant suddenly are triggered to action. Flowers of different colors and kind suddenly bloom out of no where. Even a couple of days' rain is enough to transform the landscape. It can also be true for us. We need to enter the silence and barrenness of the desert to trigger our talents and gifts. Sometimes we need trials for us to bloom. So let your desert experiences produce blooming in you.

Blog by Daxx Bondoc
(www.inspirationalblogs.com)

*If you want to repost this blog please include From Inspirationalblogs.com and the end.


Wednesday, February 25, 2009

What Can You Learn from the Trials You Experience?

Have you experience trials in your life? If not, then you must be dead!
No one escape trials in this life. Only those on the cemetery are free from it. Only those buried six feet underground are resting in peace.

Many of us try to escape our trials in life, only to catch up with us in the end. Unfortunately when it catches up and gets us, it is bigger and meaner. Running away from our trials does not solve anything.

Imagine you are a lazy person. The only thing you do all day long is eat in front of the TV. Your dad noticing that you are becoming unhealthy with the kind of lifestyle you are living. So he decides to get you on a diet and exercise.

If you are a lazy person, your first initial reaction to the diet and exercise is dread and rejection. The diet and exercise to you is a sign of labor and pain. It would also mean lessening your time being a couch potato. So you try to escape it.

But the diet and the exercise are something you need. They are something that can help your body to be healthy again. And the more you are healthy the more you can enjoy life.

I believe God sends us trials for our own sake. We have become obsessed to the least important things in life and have abandoned those things that truly meaningful. We have run after a life of success than of fulfillment and happiness. We have greatly invested on our physical beauty and forgotten to develop our character and inner beauty.

Sometimes God uses trials to get us back in track. Most of us have chosen an unhealthy and worldly lifestyle that is self-destructive. Most of the times trials can knock us back to our senses. It can give us a reality check. All is not well. And most importantly you are not well.

We can view our trials as a health program for the soul. Taken well, it can eliminate those fats in our soul, like laziness, irresponsibility, indifference to the plight of others etc. It can also help us build our character. Trials can strengthen the soul. It can also be a source of wisdom. You are able to see the “real world” and not what is on TV. It can give you a deeper understanding of life, of others and yourself.

Michael Jordan did not become great because he was playing with monkeys. He became great because he was tried and challenged by the best of the best. And he overcame them. MJ won’t be a legend if he defeated monkeys in basketball!

Trials are opportunity for your personal growth and greatness. Do not run away from it.


Blog by Daxx Bondoc
(www.inspirationalblogs.com)

*If you want to repost this blog please include From Inspirationalblogs.com and the end.


Monday, February 23, 2009

Pope Says Freedom Is Realized in Service

Delivers "Lectio Divina" on Paul's Letter to Galatians

ROME, FEB. 23, 2009 (Zenit.org).- Human beings are truly free when we live in the truth of our dependency on God's love, count on him to provide all things, and serve others, says Benedict XVI.

The Pope affirmed this Friday in a visit to Rome's major seminary, in which he delivered a "lectio divina" on the text of St. Paul to the Galatians: "You were called to freedom."

"At all times," he noted, "freedom has been humanity's great dream, since the beginning, but particularly in modern times."

The Pontiff posed these questions to the seminarians: "What is freedom? How can we be free?"

Referring to St. Paul's exhortation to not use freedom as an opportunity for the "flesh," the Holy Father noted that this "flesh" refers to "the absolutizing of the I, of the I that wants to be all and have everything for itself."

He explained: "In short, the absolute I, which does not depend on anything or anyone, seems really to possess freedom. I am free if I do not depend on anyone, if I can do everything I wish."

However, he pointed out, this is not freedom but rather the "degradation of man."

True freedom

Benedict XVI asserted that "we are free if we become one another's servants."

He added: "To reduce oneself to the flesh, apparently raising oneself to the rank of divinity -- 'I, man alone' -- introduces a lie […].

"This goes against the truth of our being. Our truth is, above all, that we are creatures, creatures of God and we live in relationship with the Creator.

"We are rational beings, and only by accepting this relationship do we enter into truth, otherwise we fall into falsehood and, in the end, are destroyed by it."

The Pope underlined the dependency that we as creatures have on God, who loves us. Thus, he said, "our dependence implies being in the realm of his love, in this case, in fact, dependency is freedom."

He added: "And because of this to see God, to orient oneself to God, to know God, to know the will of God, to insert oneself in his will, that is, in the love of God is to enter increasingly into the realm of truth."

Serve others

The Pontiff turned his focus to the relationship each person has with each other. He said, "In other words, human freedom is, on one hand, to be in the joy and great realm of the love of God, but it also implies being only one thing with the other and for the other."

"Only a shared freedom is human freedom," he affirmed, and "in being together we can enter the symphony of freedom."

The Holy Father stated: "To serve one another becomes an instrument of freedom, and here we can include a whole philosophy of politics according to the social doctrine of the Church, which helps us to find this common order that gives each one his place in the common life of humanity.

"The first reality that must be respected, therefore, is truth: Freedom against truth is not freedom. To serve one another creates the common realm of freedom."

"By participation in the sacraments," he pointed out, "by listening to the Word of God, the Divine Will, the divine law really enters our will, our will identifies with his, they become only one will and thus we are really free, we can really do what we will, because we love with Christ, we love in truth and with truth."

Sunday, February 22, 2009

Q. Don't you have to learn from your own mistakes to become who you are?

Q. Don't you have to learn from your own mistakes to become who you are? That way, if you experience it for yourself, you can decide if it’s right or wrong for you. I’d imagine you made some mistakes, and in the end, I think it makes you a more stable person. I know what is considered "right" and "wrong", but shouldn’t there be a time when we don’t conform and make up our own minds on certain issues?

A. Imagine if you went to the DMV to take the test to receive your driver’s license. When asked certain questions during your drive test, you said to the instructor, “Instead of following all your little laws and signs, I think I need to learn from my mistakes as a driver. In the end, it will make me a well-rounded person. Why should I conform to what side of the road you want me on when I can make up my own mind?”

Needless to say, you’d be taking the bus home from the DMV.

Just as we are not able to create our own laws on the highway, we are not able to make up our own private system of moral values. God has created the moral law, and he has done it for our sakes, just as the builders of highways erect guardrails in front of cliffs. Trust his plan for you, instead of assuming that you need to disobey him in order to find your identity or experience real freedom.

As David said to God in the book of Psalms, “Better is one day in your court, that thousands elsewhere.” One moment living in the will of God is greater than all of the experiences you could gain by living for years in opposition to God’s plans for you.

Every minute of every day, you and I have the chance to make different mistakes, and God does not take that ability away from us. But we should not rely on our mistakes to gain understanding. For example, I could cheat on my wife, and learn from that. I could get addicted to cocaine, and learn from that. I could refuse to potty train my dog, and learn from that. Just because you can learn from something does not mean that you should do it.

A wise person can examine the possible outcomes of a behavior, and use that information to make the best decision. For example, I received a letter from girl who was a great volleyball athlete at her school. She started sleeping with her boyfriend and became pregnant. She told her parents and they were furious. Her mom wanted her to have an abortion, so she ran away with her boyfriend, and they lived on the streets and slept in a cemetery. She was able to shower once a week, and barely had any food to eat. Eventually, she gave up and went home to her mom, who forced her to have an abortion. Then, her boyfriend left her and she realized she never really loved him.

Did she learn a lot from these trials? You bet. But does she wish it all never happened? She’d pay a million dollars for that. She has first hand knowledge of the consequences of her actions. But you can foresee the effects of your actions without having to do them. This is the difference between wisdom and foolishness. A reliable person tells two people that the stove is hot. The wise person trusts the information. The fool ends up with blisters on his hands.

Sin will offer you plenty of experiences, but so does refusing to sin. In fact, I think I’ve learned the most from not committing certain sins. I learned that God is trustworthy, and that he honors those who honor him. Who I am today is shaped by a million things. But when I die, the one thing that I want to have shaped me the most is God’s will. Therefore, if you desire wisdom, go to God. If you want to know yourself, come to him. He knows you better than you know yourself.

So trust me, if I am a stable person, it’s not because of my sins. It is because I stopped them, never went back to them, or never started them. Take, for example, Mother Teresa. To me, she was stable and saw life in with great perspective. This was because she knew that life was not worth living unless it was lived for others. She did not learn this from turning from God, but by turning to him, and looking at all of reality in His light.

Who you are is shaped by your choices, and who you become shapes the choices you make. Therefore, choose wisely.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Q. What's HPV?

A. Human papillomavirus (HPV) is the most common STD in the world, infecting more than 440 million people.[1] There are over one hundred different types of HPV, and about thirty to forty of them cause genital infections.[2] While most people who contract HPV will not suffer serious consequences from the virus, it does cause 99.7 percent of cervical cancer, and this kills approximately 288,000 women annually.[3]

In the United States the annual death toll from cervical cancer is fewer than four thousand. The reason for the relatively low figure is that HPV is often treated before it leads to cervical cancer. Unfortunately, women in developing nations often lack adequate health care and routine Pap testing. Therefore they are much more likely to suffer the full consequences of the virus.
HPV can also cause genital skin cancer, which has killed more than thirty thousand people in the United States.[4]. Finally, HPV can cause genital warts, but only 1 percent of sexually active people experience this symptom.[5].

Unfortunately, the virus can impact the health of children born to infected mothers. For example, I know of parents who took their infant to the doctor because she had a sore throat. The doctor examined her and told the parents that the child had genital warts growing on her larynx. This condition, recurrent respiratory papillomatosis (RRP), is uncommon but still infects over two thousand children each year.[6] Since there is no cure for HPV, children with RRP often require laser surgeries to remove the warts. Sadly, the average child with RRP needs surgery every three months for several years; such a child will have more than twenty surgeries over the course of his or her lifetime.[7]

Because the virus usually does not show symptoms, most people who have HPV are unaware of their infection. Also, HPV can remain latent in a person’s body for a considerable amount of time. For example, some women have contracted the virus as teens and not suffered health effects from the infection until their thirties or forties. Also, when a woman gets checked for signs of HPV, the doctor’s colposcope may fail to detect genital wart infestations. Doctors may also give a woman a Pap test to see if there is any abnormal cell growth in her cervix caused by HPV. However, this is not technically an “HPV test.” In fact, one study of more than three hundred sexually active teen girls discovered that 62 percent of the girls were infected with HPV, despite the fact that most of them had normal Pap test results![8]

Because the Pap test can sometimes fail to detect HPV, many doctors recommend a yearly test for any woman who has been sexually active, even if she is now abstinent. HPV DNA tests are now available as well. Through an HPV DNA test, a woman who has HPV can know which type (or types) of the virus she is infected with. Doctors can then tell her if she is in a high or low risk category and can follow up with her accordingly.

Recently scientists have developed a vaccine against HPV for women. Although it only prevents a few types of HPV, which infect only 3 percent of women,[9] those few types are responsible for causing most cases of cervical cancer and genital warts.

Men can be infected with HPV as well, but they are less likely to develop cancer from it, so they are often considered “vectors” for the virus. For example, when a husband is infected with HPV, his wife is five times as likely to get cervical cancer.[10] Unfortunately, most men with HPV who get tested for STDs will not learn of their infection unless they have visible genital warts. HPV DNA testing does exist for men, but it is expensive and usually only used for research purposes.

How common is the virus among males? One way to know is to consider how quickly women are infected. According to the British Journal of Obstetrics and Gynecology, 46 percent of teenage girls acquire HPV from their first sexual relationship.[11] Such high rates of infection are widely reported, and scientists estimate that over 50 percent of sexually active men and women have been infected with one or more types of genital HPV.[12] Such high numbers seem almost unbelievable. But one must remember that most people with HPV will not show symptoms or suffer as a result of it.

Although HPV is incurable, this does not mean that it is permanent, like herpes. In fact, HPV will usually go away within a few years.[13] So despite the fact that most women have been infected with HPV,[14] only 27 percent currently test positive for the virus.[15]

Young women are most at risk for HPV infection. For example, 40 percent of sexually active girls between the ages of fourteen and nineteen are currently infected with HPV. The numbers are even higher for women aged twenty to twenty-four (49 percent)![16] Among all women this age bracket has the highest rate of HPV.

The prevalence of HPV also varies according to marital status. For example, only 17 percent of married women are currently infected. However, nearly half of all women who are living with their boyfriends are infected with the virus.[17]

One reason why the virus is so common is that HPV can spread by any genital contact (genital, oral, or by means of the hands).[18] The virus can also be present, without symptoms, on a person’s abdomen or thighs.[19] Therefore condoms are not very effective in preventing its transmission.

This is perhaps one reason why we don’t hear more about HPV. It is the Achilles’ heel of the “safe sex” campaign. For example, researchers followed hundreds of college girls without HPV and discovered that 60 percent of them contracted the virus by the end of the study. According to the researchers, “always using male condoms with a new partner was not protective [of HPV].”[20] One has to wonder if these women would have made different choices if they knew the limitations of the condom.

In order to educate the public about HPV, Congress passed Public Law 106-554. Among other things, this law required government health agencies to make sure that educational materials are “medically accurate regarding the overall effectiveness or lack of effectiveness of condoms in preventing sexually transmitted diseases, including HPV.”[21] Condom labels were to be reexamined for medical accuracy, and the Centers for Disease Control (CDC) were directed to create a report that outlined the best strategies to avoid HPV.

The CDC finally published their report three years later, admitting, “The available scientific evidence is not sufficient to recommend condoms as a primary prevention strategy for the prevention of genital HPV infection.”[22] While condom use may reduce the risk of HPV-related diseases, the CDC explained earlier that “studies which have attempted to assess male condom benefit for women have generally found no evidence of protection against [HPV] infection.”[23]

As soon as the CDC released its report, Congressman Mark Souder wrote a letter to the commissioner of the Food and Drug Administration:

A meta-analysis reviewing “the best available data describing the relationship between condoms and HPV-related conditions” from the past two decades published in the November 29, 2002 edition of the journal Sexually Transmitted Diseases found, “There was no consistent evidence of a protective effect of condom use on HPV DNA detection, and in some studies, condom use was associated with a slightly increased risk for these lesions.” Three years after Public Law 106-554 was signed by President Clinton, condom labels still do not warn consumers about the lack of protection against HPV infection. The Subcommittee urges FDA to act on the release of CDC’s HPV prevention report and immediately relabel condoms to alert consumers that condoms do not provide effective protection against HPV infection.[24]

Because of the inadequacy of the condom in preventing HPV, many people contract the virus while engaging in what they mistakenly believe to be “safe sex.” Senator Tom Coburn, who has been working for years to encourage the FDA to correct condom labels, testified, “It is a cruel distortion of the word ‘prevention’ to tell women and young girls that the tremendous physical, emotional and financial costs of treatment for HPV infection are a cost worth bearing as a consequence of federal health agencies’ intentional distortion and cover-up of scientific data related to HPV.”[25] The financial impact he mentioned is the fact that Americans spend up to six billion dollars each year treating HPV.

While some government officials have urged the FDA to update condom labels, other politicians want it left alone. Congressman Henry Waxman, a long-time opponent of abstinence education, argued, “We want to be sure that we do not end up with an unintended effect of confusing people about the situations where condoms do work. . . . [Condom labels] that include information on HPV can result in so much information on such a small package that it reduces the effectiveness of any information.”[26] Therefore he believes that undermining the public’s confidence in the condom will have “serious public health consequences.” He added, “Are condoms perfect? Of course not. But reality requires us not to make a public health strategy against protection, but rather to ask a key question: compared to what?”[27]

Unfortunately, since Waxman thinks purity is unrealistic, his only option to stop STDs is to exaggerate condom effectiveness in hopes that more people will use them. Some health “experts” concur, saying they we don’t want to “create an epidemic of panic, fear, and anxiety in adolescents and young adults who are embarking on their sexual careers.”[28] One leader in the sex ed movement tried to put an optimistic spin on the issue by saying, “I don’t think we, in any way, want to do anything that will frighten people from using condoms. . . . The bottom-line message always needs to be that most STDs are treatable.”[29]

In the midst of the debate, the FDA has not done a great deal. It said that it is “certainly committed to looking at this and making the requisite changes.”[30] It added that it is “preparing new guidance on condom labeling,” “exploring new opportunities to best inform condom users about important limitations of the device,” and “proposing to amend the classification regulations for condoms.”[31] In other words, not much has changed.

The lack of clarity from government agencies has contributed to confusion within the contraceptive industry. For example, the makers of LifeStyles Condoms issued a press release “encouraging people to have a love affair with condoms.”[32] In it the manufacturers claimed that safe sex reduces the risk of HPV transmission. When asked for the scientific proof to back up their claim, they admitted that their public relations firm “mistakenly included HPV among the diseases for which latex condoms provide protection.”[33]

In 2005 the FDA took a step in the right direction and drafted a document with proposed language for a new condom label. As a result of this document, the commissioner of the FDA said the agency “received roughly 400 comments on the proposed rule. Almost all comments suggested the proposed labeling language was confusing and difficult for consumers to understand. As a result, the Agency intends to undertake additional labeling comprehension studies to help insure that the final labeling recommendations issued by the Agency are understandable to users.”[34]

While the FDA is undertaking its condom “labeling comprehension studies,” millions of people are being infected with HPV while overestimating the effectiveness of so-called “safe sex.”
_____________________________
[1]. F. Martinon-Torres, et al., “[Human Papillomavirus Vaccines: A New Challenge for Pediatricians],” Anales de PediatrĂ­a 65:5 (November 2006): 461–469; Helen Trottier and Eduardo L. Franco, “The Epidemiology of Genital Human Papillomavirus Infection,” Vaccine 24:S1 (30 March 2006): S4; Division of STD Prevention “Prevention of Genital HPV Infection and Sequelae: Report of an External Consultants’ Meeting,” Department of Health and Human Services, Atlanta: Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) (December 1999): 1; Janet Torpy, “Human Papillomavirus Infection,” The Journal of the American Medical Association 297:8 (28 February 2007): 912.
[2]. M. A. Van Ranst et al., “Taxonomy of the Human Papillomaviruses,” Papillomavirus Report 3 (1993): 61–65. As reported by NIH, “Scientific Evidence on Condom Effectiveness for Sexually Transmitted Disease (STD) Prevention,” 23.
[3]. World Health Organization, “Cervical Cancer,” International Agency for Research on Cancer, 2005 (www.iarc.fr).
[4]. “Genital Skin Cancer More Deadly for Women,” HealthDay News (5 February 2007).
[5]. L. Koutsky, “Epidemiology of Genital Human Papillomavirus Infection,” The
American Journal of Medicine 102:5A (5 May 1997): 3–8.
[6]. Eloise M Harman, “Recurrent Respiratory Papillomatosis,” www.emedicine.com (2 June 2006).
[7]. Harman.
[8]. Tarkowski, et al., 46–50.
[9]. Eileen F. Dunne, et al., “Prevalence of HPV Infection Among Females in the United States,” The Journal of the American Medical Association 297:8 (28 February 2007): 813–819.
[10]. F. Xavier Bosch, et al., “Male Sexual Behavior and Human Papillomavirus DNA: Key Risk Factors for Cervical Cancer in Spain,” Journal of the National Cancer Institute 88:15 (August 1996): 1060–1067.
[11]. S. Collins, et al., “High Incidence of Cervical Human Papillomavirus Infection in Women During Their First Sexual Relationship,” BJOG : An International Journal of Obstetrics and Gynaecology 109:1 (January 2002): 96–98.
[12]. L.E. Manhart and L.A. Koutsky, “Do Condoms Prevent Genital HPV Infection, External Genital Warts, or Cervical Neoplasia?: A Meta-Analysis,” Sexually Transmitted Diseases 29:11 (November 2002): 725–735; Division of STD Prevention “Prevention of Genital HPV Infection and Sequelae: Report of an External Consultants’ Meeting,” DHHS, (CDC), 7.
[13]. A.B. Moscicki, et al., “The Natural History of Human Papillomavirus Infection as Measured by Repeated DNA Testing in Adolescent and Young Women,” The Journal of Pediatrics 132:2 (February 1998): 277–284; E.L. Franco, et al., “Epidemiology of Acquisition and Clearance of Cervical Human Papillomavirus Infection in Women from a High-Risk Area for Cervical Cancer,” The Journal of Infectious Diseases 180:5 (November 1999): 1415–1423.
[14]. L. Koutsky, “Epidemiology of Genital Human Papillomavirus Infection,” The American Journal of Medicine 102:5A (5 May 1997): 3–8, as cited in Centers for Disease Control, “Tracking the Hidden Epidemics, Trends in STDs in the United States 2000,” (6 April 2001), 18.
[15]. Dunne, et al., 815.
[16]. Dunne, et al., 816.
[17]. Dunne, et al., 813–819.
[18]. Medical Institute for Sexual Health, Sex, Condoms, and STDs, 28; C. Sonnex, et al., 317–319; Winer, et al., 218–226; Hammarstedt, et al., 2620–2623.
[19]. NIH, “Scientific Evidence on Condom Effectiveness for Sexually Transmitted Disease (STD) Prevention,” 26; House of Representatives, “Breast and Cervical Cancer Prevention and Treatment Act of 1999” (22 November 1999), 10.
[20]. Winer, et al., Genital Human Papillomavirus Infection: Incidence and Risk Factors in a Cohort of Female University Students,” American Journal of Epidemiology 157:3 (1 February 2003): 218.
[21]. Public Law 106-554, 106th Congress, 114 Stat. 2763 (21 December 2000).
[22]. Julie Louise Gerberding, “Report to Congress: Prevention of Genital Human Papillomavirus Infection,” Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, Department of Health and Human Services (June 2004), 4–5.
[23]. Division of STD Prevention “Prevention of Genital HPV Infection and Sequelae: Report of an External Consultants’ Meeting,” DHHS, (CDC), 14.
[24]. “Rep. Souder Asks FDA for Action on Condom & HPV Information Law,” abstinence.net (12 February 2004), emphasis mine; Manhart and Koutsky, 725–735.
[25]. Tom Coburn, “Cervical Cancer and Human Papillomavirus,” Hearing before the Subcommittee on Criminal Justice, Drug Policy and Human Resources, U.S. House of Representatives(11 March 2004), 4.
[26]. Ilka Couto and Cynthia Dailard, “Wanted: A Balanced Policy and Program Response to HPV and Cervical Cancer,” The Guttmacher Report on Public Policy 2:6 (December 1999).
[27]. Lara Jakes Jordan, “Condom Warning Labels Mulled,” cbsnews.com The Associated Press, Washington (12 March 2004).
[28]. Audio Transcript, “Scientific Evidence on Condom Effectiveness and STD Prevention,” National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases (12–13 June 2000).
[29]. Tamara Kerinin, as quoted by Cheryl Wetzstein, “Agencies Rapped for Shirking HPV Law,” The Washington Times (23 December 2003).
[30]. Sylvia Smith “Condom Labels Called Inadequate,” The Journal Gazette (12 March 2004) 5-A.
[31]. Statement of Daniel G. Schultz, M.D. Before the Subcommittee on Criminal Justice, Drug Policy, and Human Resources Committee on Government Reform United States House of Representatives March 11, 2004.
[32]. LifeStyles Condoms, Press Release, Ansell Healthcare, Inc. (31 July 2000).
[33]. Letter from Kerry A. Hoffman, Regional Director, Ansell Healthcare, Inc. (8 September 2000).
[34]. “Latest News: Andrew C. Von Eschenbach, M.D. Confirmation, Questions for the Record,” Abstinence Clearinghouse E-mail Update (9 September 2006), Reply to Question 14.

Sunday, February 15, 2009

What is Pure Love?

by Jason Evert

“Do you want real love?”

If genuine love has escaped you thus far, if think you’ve already found that perfect someone, or if regrets and confusion have made you wonder if the love you’ve dreamed of really exists, the following pages have been written for you.

If you’re like me, you’ve been told that sex is bad. But when you ask why, you hear something like, “It’s just bad, so don’t do it,” or “You’ll get a disease or get pregnant!” While I’m sure you realize that sex has its consequences—and they might be bad if they happen—these reasons aren’t always convincing.

Our generation has been taught how to avoid venereal infections, but what we really want to know is how to find, build, and maintain a relationship of real love. Sex is supposed to be a great gift, so it’s easy to get tired of hearing about the diseases and unwed pregnancy rates. If you’re ready for a different approach, and you want the gift of sex to be as great as it was meant to be, read on.

“How do I find love?”

Everyone wants love. Everyone longs to give himself or herself to another. We’re made for love, and that need in us is so deep that many would rather risk getting pregnant or getting an STD than live without love. We may be willing to take these risks because the world tells us that sex equals love. Then we see relationships in which sex destroyed love, and we wonder what went wrong. The only solution capable of breaking through this hurt and confusion is the virtue known as chastity.

“What’s chastity?”

Chastity is a virtue (like courage or honesty) that applies to a person’s sexuality. It means that you take all of your sexual desires and order them according to the demands of real love. For example, when you love a person, you make whatever sacrifice is best for them and you do whatever is necessary to keep from harming them. Chastity means that you take this definition of love and apply it to sex.

Some think that chastity simply means “no sex.” But that’s abstinence: focusing on what you can’t do and can’t have. Chastity is what you can do and can have, right now: a lifestyle that brings freedom, respect, peace, and even romance—without regret. Chastity frees a couple from the selfish attitude of using each other as objects, thus making them capable of true love.


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Wednesday, February 11, 2009

In What Kind of Relationship Are You In? Give and Take or Give and Receive?

We often hear that to be in a good relationship there has to be a “give and take” within the partners. But I think sometimes the “give and take” mentality can get old quick, because it has a tendency to be selfish. I give so I can take. Their giving becomes an indirect egotism. St Thomas Aquinas defines love as to will the good of the other as other. There is no hidden agenda in real love. You love the person for the sake of the person and not because you can get something out of the person. A real loving relationship practices “give and receive.” There is no need for taking because the longings are being given by the partner even before the other asks for it. Two persons who are deeply in love are focused on their beloved and not on themselves. They want to make their beloved happy. He puts her before himself every time in every thing. And she does the same. Both are satisfied and fulfilled. Both feel loved. Most of us when we are considering entering into a relationship with someone ask this question, “What can I get from this person?” Another way of putting it is “What can this person give me?” I think we should have a radical change of attitude if we want to experience real and lasting love. We must change the question “What can I get” to “What can I give to this person?” The best example of this love is Jesus on the Cross. When Jesus let Himself get crucified, it was solely for you and me. There was no hidden agenda on Jesus’ suffering except our salvation. It was a totally selfless act. Jesus died because He loved you and me. PERIOD. So if we want to have a beautiful relationship, we must learn to love like Jesus. Our love has to be totally unselfish and self-giving. There is no greater love than to give one’s life for a friend.

Blog by Daxx Bondoc
(www.inspirationalblogs.com)

*If you want to repost this blog please include From Inspirationalblogs.com and the end.

Monday, February 9, 2009

What does selfishness has to do with loneliness?

There are more than 6.7 billion people living on this planet right now. The planet has never been this populated. Yet this world have never experience so much loneliness like we do today. The more the people the less we are supposed to be alone. But many of us are alone. And worse is many of us are lonely. So what happened with the saying “The more the merrier?” I believe that the cause of this plague of loneliness is our very own selfishness. We have solely focused everything towards ourselves and forgotten others. We have chosen to disconnect ourselves to the rest of humanity when we placed ourselves as the center of the universe, the place of God. Each one of us was made for love. We long to love and be loved. To be denied of love, is to be denied of one of our most basic need. The state or feeling of being unloved is what we often call loneliness. Loneliness is one of the worst poverty one can experience. Because of our selfishness we have forgotten what real love is. We have focused are actions on taking than on sharing. We have a world full of Go-Getters and hoarders. Because of our mentality of getting we forgot to give. Now everyone feels deprived and empty because no one is giving. Unconditional love is scarce these days. It is funny because our own greed has made us poor. We fill ourselves with worldly stuffs but feel empty in the inside. We jump from one party to the next only to go home feeling so more lonely the before. We pursued to get everything we want, only to realize that it does not cure our emptiness. I believe to solution to loneliness is love. We must learn give ourselves to be filled. St. Francis of Assisi said, “It is in giving that we receive.” The world needs the Go-Givers to make this lonely planet less lonely. “Where there is no love, put love and you will draw out love.” – St John of the Cross


Blog by Daxx Bondoc
(www.inspirationalblogs.com)

*If you want to repost this blog please include From Inspirationalblogs.com and the end.

Sunday, February 8, 2009

Q. Why is the Catholic Church against contraception?

A. Contraception is nothing new; history records people using various methods of birth control four thousand years ago. Ancient people swallowed potions to cause temporary sterility; they used linens, wool, or animal skins as barrier methods; they fumigated the uterus with poison to keep it from bearing life. The Romans practiced contraception, but the early Christians stood out from the pagan culture because they refused to use it.[1] Scripture condemned the act (Gen. 38:8–10), as did all Christian denominations before 1930.

At that time the Anglican Church decided to allow contraception in some circumstances. They soon gave in on the issue altogether, and before long all Protestant denominations followed suit. Now only the Catholic Church stands fast on the teaching of historic Christianity. But why? Why doesn’t the Church “get with the times”?

The modern world has trouble understanding the Church’s stance on contraception because the world does not know the purpose of sex. The writer Frank Sheed said that “modern man practically never thinks about sex.” He dreams of it, craves it, pictures it, drools over it, but never pauses to actually think about it. Sheed continued: “Our typical modern man, when he gives his mind to it at all, thinks of sex as something we are lucky enough to have; and he sees all its problems rolled into the one problem of how to get the most pleasure out of it.”[2]

But we should put more thought into the matter. Who invented sex? What is sex? What is its purpose? What is it worth? For starters, God invented sex. Since he is its author, he knows its meaning and purpose better than we do. God has revealed that the purposes of sex are procreation and union (babies and bonding), and that the sexual act can be thought of as the wedding vows made flesh. The wedding vows are promises that your love will be free, faithful, total, and open to life. Each act of marital intercourse should be a renewal of these vows.

Some couples say that they will be open to life but will contracept between kids. In other words, they will be completely open to life—except when they sterilize their acts of love. Imagine if they had the same mentality with other parts of the wedding vows. Can a wife say she is faithful except when she has affairs? Can she say that she will give herself totally to her husband as long as he’s rich? Can a husband say the marital act is free except when he forces himself upon his wife? All of this is absurd, but contracepting couples contradict their own vows in a similar way when they refuse to be open to God’s gift of life. When it comes down to it, they are afraid of what sex really means.

But sex is more than the wedding vows made flesh. It is also a reflection of the life-giving love of the Trinity. In the words of Carlo Cardinal Martini, “In the Bible, the man-woman couple is not meant to be simply a preservation of the species, as is the case for the other animals. Insofar as it was called to become the image and likeness of God, it expresses in a bodily, tangible way the face of God, which is Love.”[3] God’s plan for us to love as he loves is stamped into our very being, and so there is really only one question to ask when it comes to sexual morality: “Am I expressing God’s love through my body?” When a married couple does this, they become what they are—an image of Trinitarian love—and through this they unveil the love of God to the world.

The act of life-giving love between a husband and wife is also meant to be a mirror of the love that Christ has for his Church. We should ask ourselves: “If we consider the relationship between Christ and his Church, where does contraception fit into the picture? What is contraceptive about Christ’s love?”

Beyond the theological implications, consider the consequences of contraception in society. When contraception spread among Christians, the Catholic Church warned about the harm it would inflict on relationships. Rates of marital infidelity would increase because spouses could be unfaithful without fear of pregnancy. Since contraception offers an easy way to elude the moral law, there would be a general lowering of morality. The Church “feared that the man, growing used to the employment of anti-conceptive practices, may finally lose respect for the woman, and no longer caring for her physical and psychological equilibrium, may come to the point of considering her a mere instrument of selfish enjoyment, and no longer as his respected and beloved companion.”[4] Furthermore, if people could separate making love from making life, then why would those acts that are unable to make life (homosexual sex or masturbation) be forbidden? With the increase in contraceptive use, it would become increasingly difficult to view sexuality as a sign of God’s love.

Some argue that the Church restricts women’s freedom by opposing contraception. However, the sour fruit of contraceptive “liberation” is manifested most clearly not by arguments but by the lives of those who accept such false ideas of freedom. Consider the following question that one young woman sent to Dear Abby: “I am a twenty-three-year-old liberated woman who has been on the Pill for two years. It’s getting pretty expensive and I think my boyfriend should share half the cost, but I don’t know him well enough to discuss money with him.”[5]

In the words of Christopher West, “If the real problem behind women’s oppression is men’s failure to treat them properly as persons, contraception is a sure way to keep women in chains.”[6] The earliest feminists opposed contraception for this reason, and some modern feminists still realize that contraception is the enemy of women’s liberation.[7]

Anthropologists who study the origin and destruction of civilizations have noted that societies that do not direct their sexual energies toward the good of marriage and family begin to crumble.[8] Therefore the Church did not hesitate to point out the vast implications of contraception. The love between a husband and wife holds a marriage together. A strong marriage holds the family together. Strong families hold society together, and a civilization will stand or fall upon this. “The future of humanity,” according to the Church, “passes by way of the family.”[9] If it can be shown that contraception compromises intimacy between a husband and wife, invites selfishness into the marital act, and opens a door for greater infidelity, then contraception is a cancer to civilization itself.

For a great explanation of why the Church opposes contraception, check out Janet Smith's tape, Contraception, Why Not?.
_________________________
[1] St. Augustine Marriage and Concupiscence 1:15:17 (A.D. 419), St. John Chrysostom Homilies on Romans 24 (A.D. 391), and others. (www.catholic.com/library/Contraception_and_Sterilization.asp).
[2] Frank Sheed, Society and Sanity (New York: Sheed and Ward, 1953), 107.
[3]. Cardinal Carlo Martini, On the Body (New York: Crossroad Publishing Co., 2000), 49.
[4]. Pope Paul VI, encyclical letter, Humanae Vitae 17 (Of Human Life), (Boston: Pauline Books & Media, 1997).
[5]. Abigail Van Buren, The Best of Dear Abby (New York: Andrews and McMeel, 1981), 242, as quoted in DeMarco, New Perspectives, 42.
[6]. West, Good News About Sex and Marriage, 122.
[7]. Donald DeMarco, “Contraception and the Trivialization of Sex” (www.cuf.org/july99a.htm).
[8]. Donald DeMarco, New Perspectives on Contraception (Dayton, Ohio: One More Soul, 1999), 89.
[9]. Pope John Paul II, apostolic exhortation, Familiaris Consortio 86 (The Role of the Christian Family in the Modern World), (Boston: Pauline Books & Media, 1981).

from http://www.chastity.com/chastity/index.php?id=7&entryid=90

Friday, February 6, 2009

How Does Failures Prepare You for Greatness?

Do you think at this moment you have what it takes to be great? Do you have the strength and wisdom to achieve your dreams now?

Many of us, if we are humble enough, can say to ourselves we are not ready to realize our dreams yet. We don’t have the capacity to handle what we want in life.

We think that success will make us better, and it can. But there is also danger with success; it can bloat our ego or pride. And once our ego gets bloated we have a tendency to be unrealistic. We can over estimate ourselves, which can lead to disaster. Pride can delude us that we are the best when we are not. Pride is an obstacle to really becoming a great person.

Failures on the other hand can teach us humility. Failures can make us realize our weaknesses that we need to overcome. It also forces us to go beyond ourselves. Failures push us to find new ways and strategies in pursuing our goals. Failures taken well, can teach us much wisdom that cannot be found in books or at class.

Failures also toughen us. Imagine you want to fight a champion boxer. Do you think you can go on the ring with him now? You will be massacred I bet. Before you go to the big league you need to be beaten up, toughen up. Your body needs to be hit by strong punches so your muscle would adjust to the blows. Your body needs to be tough if you want to stay in the ring and win the fight. If you fight a champion boxer now, he will take you down in one punch. To be the champ you need to pay the price. No pain, no gain.

Many of us want to be successful, but we don’t think about the problems that come with it. If you have a multi-million dollar company, you are always at a risk of multi-millions. Can you handle that pressure?

I watch American movie stars, and how they cracked under the weight of success and fame. Many of them become addicted to drugs, sex or alcohol. Some even can’t handle their stardom and go nuts. Some even commit suicide.

So better think again. Can you handle the success you desire?

Our failures in life can help us prepare for the success that lies ahead. It can give us the wisdom, strength and detachment we need to make the big critical decisions when we are up there at the top.

So when failure comes, take is as a preparation for greatness.

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Do You Feel All is Lost in Your Life Because of the Suffering You are In?

Suffering and pain is one of the hardest mysteries man has to face. Many have lost faith because of this.

So how can we look at suffering and not lose hope?

Imagine you found a book, The Two Towers of The Lord of the Rings. But the book you found lacked the last chapter. The book ended with the Orcs seizing Minas Tirith and defeating the humans. You would think that it was a depressing novel!

Because who have not read what happens next, which is the Riders of Rohan arrives at the break of dawn and defeated the invading Orcs, you would have miss the glory of the ending of the novel.

Sometimes when suffering and pains hit us, we feel that all is lost. This is the end. We have a tendency to summarize our life in that painful moment. And we fall to discouragement and even despair.

But what we forget is that this moment is only a chapter in the story of our life. The story does not end, unless we choose to end it.

God is the Divine Story teller. He directs everything that happens in our lives. Yes, even the painful ones He permits for the greater good.

If it was not for the danger of Sauron of taking over Middle Earth, the humans and elves would have not united. The evilness of Sauron became the reason of their unity, and eventually peace in the lands.

Heroes are born in crisis. It was in the darkest moment of the story when Aragorn took on his kingly role and lead the victory. We can see in history that men’s greatness shone during the worst of times. Churchill became great during the Nazi era. Martin Luther King became great during the great racism towards the black people. And we can see with other great people like Gandhi, John Paul II and Mother Teresa, all of them became great not because it was the best of times. Their greatness shone during the worst of times.

The darker the night, the brighter the stars shine.

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times ” - Charles Dickens

We must remember that when suffering hits us, it is not the end. It is only a chapter in our lives. And the chapter continues. And we move on.

We must have faith in God that He has a beautiful ending for our lives. All we have to do is to make it there.

-daxx

Monday, February 2, 2009

How to View Failure in a Different Way

Failure is painful. Some of us never recover from it. Others out of fear of failure are crippled to live life to the full.

So how do we overcome failure and not be overcome by them?

Having suffered a lot myself, here is what i learned. I look at my failure as data. It is information that came out of a process or experiment. I try not to put emotional labels on the said failure or data as I call it.

I call my failure as undesired outcome or result.

I don’t think the saying “I tried and nothing happened” is the right way of looking at our failure. If you “tried” then something “happened”, that is simple physics. If there is an action, then there is a reaction. What we say “Nothing happened.” what we actually say is “I did not like what happened.”

Even in not doing anything, something is happening. You are “wasting your time.”

Great people have suffered a lot of failures and disappointments. What makes them different from us is they did not give up. They used their failures as stepping stones for their success. Like Bo Sanchez said, they failed their way to success.

“All misfortune is but a stepping stone to fortune.” - Henry David Thoreau

If you want to be great then be ready to fail or to have undesirable results with your effort.

Be great. Don’t quit.


Blog by Daxx Bondoc
(www.inspirationalblogs.com)

*If you want to repost this blog please include From Inspirationalblogs.com and the end.


Sunday, February 1, 2009

Inspirational Confidence Story - Abraham LinIncoln

by Catherine Pratt

Did you know that Abraham Lincoln had two business ventures fail, lost 8 different elections and had a complete nervous breakdown before becoming president in 1816? His story is a great inspirational confidence story in that he shows how if you just keep moving towards your dream, you will eventually make it.

Abraham Lincoln overcame great setbacks and obstacles on his journey. Take a look at the synopsis of his life and see whether you would have had the courage to continue on.

1809 Born February 12

1816 Abraham Lincoln's family was forced out of their home and he needed to work to support his family.

1818 His mother passed away

1828 His sister dies

1831 A business venture failed

1832 He ran for the State Legislature. He lost.

1832 In the same year, he also lost his job. He decided he wanted to go to law school but couldn't get in.

1833 He borrowed money from a friend to start a business. By the end of the year, he was bankrupt.

1834 He ran for the State Legislature again. This time he won.

1835 The year was looking better as he was engaged to be married. Unfortunately, his fiancee died and he was grief stricken.

1836 This was the year he had a total nervous breakdown and for 6 months was bedridden.

1836 He sought to become Speaker of the State Legislature. He was defeated.

1840 He sought to become Elector. He was defeated.

1842 Marries Mary Todd. They have 4 boys but only one would live to maturity.

1843 He ran for Congress. He lost.

1846 He ran for Congress again. He won and moved to Washington.

1848 He ran for re-election to Congress. He lost.

1849 He sought the job of Land Officer in his home state. He didn't get the job.

1850 His son, Edward, dies.

1854 He ran for the Senate of the United states. He lost.

1856 He sought the Vice Presidential nomination at a national convention. He got less than 100 votes.

1858 He ran for the Senate again. He lost again.

1860 Abraham Lincoln is elected President of the United States

He became one of America's greatest president.